Are you putting up your own roadblocks?

Is how you define yourself getting in your way? I identified as a chronically ill person. I suffered from severe post-concussive symptoms for several years. YEARS! Fibromyalgia pain, memory issues, migraines, constant sensitivity to light and sound, and chronic fatigue dictated what I could do with my days. I kept trying to function like a “normal” adult and I kept failing. I gave up four jobs in four years because I literally couldn’t get through my days without crashing. So, I resigned myself to the fact that I was chronically ill. The “rules” I knew I could play by were attached to that identity. This would be my life now moving forward. Period. My limitations were painfully obvious every single day. However, in my mind, acceptance left no room for hope that things could be different. I thought that acceptance was part of being mindful, but was I sabotaging myself by leaving no room for hope?

My husband kept saying I just needed more time. My brain was still healing. I didn’t believe him. If four years hadn’t been long enough to heal, it didn’t seem possible to me. If all the things I was doing to feel good enough to get through my days wasn’t propelling me forward, I figured nothing would. I moved, stretched, rested, prayed, stayed away from activities that I knew triggered fibro flares, wore sunglasses, including indoors when I needed to, ate nutritious food, got massages, floated in magnesium salt tanks with sensory deprivation, attended counseling sessions, used ice/heat, took supplements known to help with fibro and migraines, tried different medications to help with mood and pain, used essential oils, slept with a weighted blanket; the list goes on and on. I was doing all the things I knew how to do… except hoping and using positive thinking.  

Within the last year I allowed myself to hope again, and it has done wonders for me. Hope has been helping me raise the upper limit of what I think I can do, a little at a time. It allows me to see through a different lens. I look for opportunities to do things differently. Hope is helping me be me again.

Positive thinking had played a big role in my life for decades. I would purposely think about positive things and look for the bright side of every situation. I knew this was changing the wiring of my brain for the better. It was allowing the feel-good chemicals to be released in my body, like serotonin and dopamine. It raised my mood a little bit, one positive thought at a time. This practice makes hoping for a brighter future a little bit easier every day.

If you have lost your hope, ask yourself if you can be 100% certain that things have to be the way they are in your life. Can you allow yourself to imagine a different way of being? If you can, even if it’s only a tiny, tiny percentage, then start to allow a little hope to come in. Plant the seeds of positivity and do your best to nurture it every day. Who knows how much it will grow?! If you keep expecting your “norm”, you’ll stay stuck. Why not plant those seeds of hope and positivity instead and see what happens? Even if nothing changes dramatically, at the very least, you’ll be giving yourself a chance. You are worth it!